Monthly Archives: March 2010

Revealed: Scientologists Very Stressed

In an unexpected revelation, a former member of the Church of Scientology has revealed that despite the highly effective Dianetics program (which starts with a stress test), Scientology members are highly stressed. This is very strange because almost all psychological and religious advice given by science fiction writers is extremely reliable, helpful, and effective.

For those who are unfamiliar with Scientology, it is the brainchild of marginally successful science fiction writer L. Ron Hubbard who said that “if you want to make a lot of money, start your own religion.”

“This kind of criticism is something we are used to; however, we refuse to allow skepticism and antagonism from non-believers to get in the way of our members’ spiritual well being.” said David O. Uschberg, a Scientology representative, as he was counting cash contributions from members.

Source –

In other news mocking religion now deemed to be acceptable as long as it isn’t yours.

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Facebook Condom

Facebook has contributed to a resurgence in the sexually-transmitted disease syphilis, a health expert has claimed.

Professor Peter Kelly, director of public health in Teesside, claimed staff had found a link between social networking sites and the spread of the bacteria, especially among young women.

He said: “Syphilis is a devastating disease. Anyone who has unprotected sex with casual partners is at high risk.

“There has been a fourfold increase in the number of syphilis cases detected with more young women being affected.

“I don’t get the names of people affected, just figures, and I saw that several of the people had met sexual partners through these sites.

“Social networking sites are making it easier for people to meet up for casual sex.”

The solution is clear: Protective rubber sheaths for keyboards are available from good chemists.

In other news: forks have been linked to an increase in obesity.


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The Internet Knows All


“I don’t understand why I have to go to school at all, the internet knows more than all the teachers there put together.”

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Before I jump in the shower and set off for work I thought I’d see if the old blog was still alive.  With a whopping 50 visitors a day (mostly bots no doubt) it seems so.

Assuming I’m going to resurrect the old blog, what should I write about?  I fancy having a theme and “moving in a direction” rather than ambling along with the usual inanity that I am so good at. 😉

Answers on a postcard please…or, you know, in the comments box below.


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Pi day (3.14 in American date format)

Nearly missed it.

Sadly I need to catch up on my beauty sleep so I can’t really stop to shoot the breeze so instead I’ll provide a link to anyone who wishes to make a belated Pi Cake


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