Dear Mr WideHead
Picking your nose on the train is something that should be done either not at all or subtly. Not at all being the preferred option.
My fellow commuter, this morning you received my most harsh stare of disgust for your blatant delving of your nasal cavities in search of an elusive booger. When you found it you very obviously examined it, even going so far as to turn it in the dim morning light to properly appreciate the awesomeness of your sinus’ accumulated waste. Perhaps you were checking for dura matter, I don’t know.
What I do know is that I let out a audible “Eww!” of revolt when you popped the green and fetid lump into your mouth and started chewing. You seemed to enjoy it as you were rolling your tongue about in your mouth and murmuring happily. You even licked your lips.
I think I should probably thank you. I have been over eating recently and fear that I may have piled on a few pounds. Thanks to your demonstration of snot munching I am certain that I won’t be able to eat either the noodles I had planned for lunch or the cheese and onion pies I’d put in the fridge for tomorrow.
Honest Mr hoverFrog