On line tracking

I’m not expecting a package (apart from the new Harry Potter book from Amazon next week) but my conveyancer for the sale of l’étang de grenouille and purchase of le château de grenouille has an online tracking system that looks like this:

Case Steps   Actual End Date
Case Accepted – Sale   26/06/2007
Notification Of Sale   04/07/2007
Deeds Requested Transactional   06/07/2007
Deeds Received Transactional   17/07/2007
Contract Prepared & Sent Transactional   17/07/2007
All Initial Enquiries Raised    
Enquiries Completed    
Contracts Signed And Ready For Exchange Transactional    
Contract Exchanged – Sale Transactional    
Completion – Sale Transactional    

Why are they taking so long?  I’m checking the site every half hour and there is no change.  Why is that?  What are they doing?  The solicitors are obviously lazy.  Why can’t they work faster?  Who thought to put this on line where I can check it as often as I like?  I hate them and want to pull their wings off.

Some kind hearted soul* casually informed me that the conveyancers can complete the sale and purchase of a house in only one day if they actually pull their fingers out of their arses and work on it.  Now I didn’t appreciate the imagery of this much as I expect the deeds to my property to reach me (OK the bank) in an unblemished state.  I also have to sign some of these forms and hope that they wash their hands before posting them.  Really, think about what you say to a literalist like me people!

The Hildy and I agree that we are never moving again.

Tempers are fraying in le ménage de grenouille.  We really need to move soon.

In other news I am currently being eaten by every crawling and flying bug in the country.  I’m considering smearing myself in marmite in order to repel the beasties as I heard that marmite is an effective deterent against mosquitoes but I fear that this would just make me irresistable as a snack for lovers of English Jam**.

* read agitator
** The French apparently call Marmite “la Confiture Anglaise” rather than the literal translation of “Marmite” which means a large earthenware pot….apparently.

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10 Comments

Filed under le château de grenouille, You decide

10 responses to “On line tracking

  1. completely unrelated but I thought this might make you laugh… *agitator… I first read that as “*alligator”

    hehehehehe

  2. It’s exactly the sort of thing that an alligator would do. Untrustworthy devils that they are.

  3. I feel your pain. Especially from that large alligator bite, you should make sure it doesn’t go septic.

  4. Especially alligators called Spartacus

  5. I heard that they are the worst kind.

  6. I’ve just checked it again. No change!

  7. I think that Alligator Spartacus would be a good name for a solicitor.

  8. I think Spartacus Spartacus would have it beat.

  9. I’m becoming obsessed with Spartacus.

    Not in a Tony Curtis sort of way but obsessed nonetheless.

  10. I think several people are now obsessed with the thing that is Spartacus.

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